I wanted to write something profound, or funny or just something that everyone would leave comments that would boost my self-esteem, well actually my BIG EGO! Boy, I sure think of myself a lot! I don't like that side of me at all, so I'm going to share some of the children who have touched my heart through the years.

Many years ago I was an Instructional Aide in a special education classroom for 8 years. One of our little guys was Floyd. He was in fourth grade and others called him Peanut because his head was a little shaped like one. He was a quiet boy, but he was very artistic. He drew a picture of me one day and I still cherish the pencil drawing.

One of Floyd's classmates was Katie. Katie was so special to so many of us. She had had a heart attack when she was three. When she was born, Katie had a heart condition that had to be operated on and everyone thought everything would be okay. After the heart attack, she ran a tremendously high fever, and the precious little girl had to start all over from scratch. She had to learn how to walk, talk, eat and every other thing she had learned then lost.

The school year was over and then there was summer. I worked at the video store that I still work at and one Sunday I heard sirens screaming. Don't you just hate that sound? I always send out a prayer that it isn't one of our children. Unfortunately, on this beautiful summer day it was one of our kids. It was our dear Floyd. We have a river running through our town and Floyd, his sister and their cousins were swimming in the river when Floyd went under. While his cousins ran for help, his sister tried to save him. By the time the rescuers could get there, both children were nowhere to be seen. A husband and wife team of EMS are also scuba divers, plus they happened to know Floyd as their daughter was in his class. It took them awhile to locate them in the river's murky water. They found them in a sinkhole and when they pulled them up, the siblings were holding hands. Floyd's sister was 16.

Katie gradually became all she could be in her short life. We all adored her and we all grew because of her. It was the first day back to school after the Christmas Holidays. She was a freshman in high school. Her mom was one of the high school teachers. Katie collapsed in the hallway and her poor heart was just not strong enough to support her maturing body. We all cried that day!

Andrew was one of my favorites in kindergarten. I was now a Teacher Assistant in Kinder. He was so special to us. Always a smile on his face. He had a hard time learning, but that was okay. When he was in first grade, I would tutor him in reading. He was in second grade when the tragic accident happened. He and his brother would race their grandfather to and from their mailbox. Their grandfather drove his RV. Somehow Andrew slipped and fell and the RV ran over him. We all ached for him, our sweet Andrew.

I really didn't plan on ending this year on such a sad note, but wait, is it really sad? The joy I feel when I bring to mind the sweet memories I have of these dear children whom I know are now in God's loving arms, is so deep and special. The love I had and still have for these children and others we have lost at school are blessed memories.



This cheerful soul, this ungainly child
Always meek, always mild,
Never understood, never wild
This joyous soul, this ungraceful child.

The world has standards, unfair by far
Looking for perfection, a shining star,
Different is shunned, unaccepting the marred
Visibly repulsed by this body so scarred.

A gentle child, who never would hurt
A delightful child, who will never be curt,
A backwards world, must be put on alert
Be prepared to do better, to undo the hurt.

This is a comment I left on Whit's Whittlings yesterday and I wanted to share it all with you as well. There is something Whit and I do agree on is that everyone has a right to their opinion among other things. This just happens to be my opinion and why.
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Abortion is definitely a touchy subject isn't it? My thoughts on it is as follows: From the beginning of conception I feel that is a child, no matter how tiny it is because it will grow to be a child. Two of my daughters miscarried last year, yet I pray my two grandchildren are being taken care of in heaven until we will know them when it is our time to join them.(one daughter has had two miscarriages so I have 3 precious grandchildren in heaven)

I believe that God answers our prayers, but may not be how we want them to be answered. God works through people. All the prayers being said asking God to help us find a cure for diseases, or bring peace in areas around the world, I honestly believe God allows the healers and peacekeepers to be conceived, whether it be twenty years back, present or the future. So here is the problem. Millions of babies each year are being aborted. Could some of the aborted children be God's answer to our prayers?

Now on the other hand, I am at a loss when it comes to children conceived by rape or incest. I did hear years ago that one of our greatest gospel singers and I can't remember who it is, but she was the product of a rape and her mother was maybe 12 or 13 years old.

For health reasons? That hit our own family big time. My nephew's wife was pregnant when she was diagnosed with bone cancer in her knee. They gave her low amounts of chemo, but the cancer was spreading. Now they had a terrible decision to make, take the baby too early for it to survive or watch my niece die. It was heart wrenching, but they aborted the baby, eventually had to amputate my niece's leg. The cancer? The doctors thought it was gone. They became pregnant again, but the cancer returned with a vengeance. She and the baby died. She was 24 years old. The big question? Could the first child have been saved? Of course who knows?

Yes, I believe in God and I wish adults and teenagers think before they conceive a child. Yes, there are mistakes, but they should be responsible for their mistakes. After all they know having intercourse could result in a child.

I am not the judge of anyone's actions except mine and my own children as they were growing up, because that is a parent's job. Judging what is right or wrong? That is God's job. I will leave that in His tender care. In the meantime I will have my opinions and I respect other's opinions. Thanks Whit! Have a great rest of this week! ROIE
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May each and everyone of you have a FANTASTIC FRIDAY AND GOD BLESS!


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God's Will

Where are the peacemakers?
Where did they go?
Were they destroyed
Before their breath flowed?
Where are the healers
God sent to us?
Were they destroyed
Without any fuss?
What have you done
To preserve your rights?
Have you dimmed the sun?
Have you lengthened the nights?
How do you know
Who you destroyed today?
Have you realized yet
You stepped in God's way?
When will you learn
That the babies you kill,
Are our Earthly salvation
Sent to us by God's will!

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The Children Who Should Have Been

Laughing children, happy times
Lingering, moments, joyous rhymes,
Gentle urges, quick defenses
Serious actions, unguarded pretenses.
Playful journeys, shortened trips
Cautious eyes, pouting lips,
Walking faster, running legs
Empty pockets, money begs.
Dirty faces, muddy shoes
Pretty ballerinas, ghostly boos,
Lopsided smiles, toothless grins
Scraped bloody knees, bandaged chins.
Happy feelings, glistening tears
Frightening memories, extinguished fears,
Filling needs, unconditional love
God blessed, welcomed above.

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Silent Call

My tears will never fall upon
Your empty, motherhood breast,
My cries had sadly never begun
Nor shall I ever feel a loving caress.

The brisk, cool air I shall never breathe
Nor feel it upon my face,
Did it feel good to relieve
Yourself of a burgeoning disgrace?

Within the many seasons gone by
Have you thought of me at all?
Can you feel the cold of a winter's sky?
Can you hear my silent call?

The chance to live upon this earth
Had never come my way,
You had them destroy be before my birth
Now please tell me, where do I stay?

Warm December days
unusual happenings
confused proud
feathered migrants
from northern regions
of Canada.
Experiencing
a photographic high
this fine day
dark blue skies
reflecting upon
the glistening waters.
Canadian geese
visiting locals
of the feathered sort
a welcoming sight
upon the small lake
at the city's center.
My excited heart
rapidly beating
with camera in hand
walking among
geese & friends
regal in their stance.
Photographing
their beauty
leisurely swimmers
creating ripples
so subtle toward
the inviting shore.
Winter days
still looming
visitors unaware
their warm haven
will soon
be no more.
Confusion
will arise
sounds of
fluttering wings
take flight
toward southern regions.
But for now
enjoyment invades
my southern
Texas soul
my photographic high
ends the year 2005.

What a thrill to see the skies full of migrating geese while visiting my daughter here in Lubbock. It is 75 degrees today, expecting 60 degrees tomorrow.I am so excited to see the results of my photographic find only a few blocks from my daughter's home.

Just watching the news and terrible grass fires in so many places including a little town, Cross Plains, that we will drive back through on our way home Monday. Please pray for those who not only lost their homes, but family members as well as they are saying 3 have died in the fires.

Blessings to all and now I have to go. Our youngest daughter has been cooking and just walked in with dinner. Boy, it sure smells great.

The Glory of God

My mission upon this earth is complete
Until that day when we again shall meet,
Heavenward-bound, my soul is soaring
Within God's realm of spiritual exploring.

There is a sadness when saying goodbye
Yet we must remember the reason why,
With silent tears dampening our faces
Our Dear Lord is awaiting to embrace us.

Please do not mourn for very long
Pray Our Father will help you remain strong,
Instead rejoice for my spiritual well-being
The Glory of God I will soon be seeing.

As the church bells are joyously ringing
The sweet voices of the angels are singing,
My heavenly home is waiting for me
Be glad in Him, now I am worldly free.

With

Good Morning Colo and SrWilliam.

Thanks for taking the time to drop by. Colo, you are very observant with your comment to my blog, "Pitiful Truth Be Told" just before this one. I actually wrote this in my comment section, but decided to make it my blog instead since it got a little long.

I suffer from depression and truth be told, I have on and off since I was 12 years old. It runs in my family and fortunately I recognize the problem and take meds for it. I have two daughters who also have to take them and another one should be on them, but she doesn't recognize the problem right now. She'll have to make the decision on her own. I have a sister and three brothers and they should all be on meds, but they aren't. So sad!

Anyway since the holidays I have been haphazard about taking my meds, thus the dark thoughts are creeping in. But it only takes a day or two to get me on the happy track again. Without my meds I couldn't deal with all I have to deal with.

When I get home from our vacation next week, I'll have to post some of my dark poetry from my non-medicated days. Of course a lot of my poetry I've already shared on here was written before taking meds, but as I said the depression came and went, but these last years it just became full blown and even through prayer I couldn't handle it by myself. That's when I totally put it all in God's hands, He told my inner soul to seek help from those He created to become wonderful, knowing doctors.

No I don't literally hear His voice, but I was baptized and accepted the Holy Spirit Who is always with me and He guides me when I especially realize I just can't do it all by myself.

My meds don't make me feel high or give me a buzz. What they do do is to keep the depression from invading my whole being. I still have highs and lows because life just throws you for a loop sometimes, but even the lows are feeling the sadness of the situation, but instead of letting it become a debilitating situation, they help you stay lucid and capable of helping others or yourself. It is a great feeling to not sweat the small stuff and the big stuff, just look at it and work your way through it without destroying yourself or those who love you the most.

I know I have probably repeated myself, but maybe, just maybe someone will read this and realize it's okay to seek help if you need it. IT'S OKAY!!!!!!